Anxiety update

I went to the regular doctor today for the ER follow up. He is scheduling me for an echo-cardio gram and stress test. This sounds like fun. I'm 32 and am going through this. What the heck? I'm happy that he wants to rule out a problem with my heart, but now I have to do the tests. He thinks it could be three things: anxiety, heart, or acid relux. Acid Relux? I have NEVER had any signs of this, not even when I was pregnant. I took some Xanax and am feeling pretty good right now. R is also feeling a bit guilty about his hissy fit childish behavior because of my anxiety. It could really all be for the best on that front.

However, to add to my anxiety, my mom called with very distressing news that my grandpa is not well. He has pancreatitis (sp) which is caused by the gall stones that he has. They need to remove his gall bladder. This is normally no big whoop, but HE'S ALMOST 91 WITH A BAD HEART AND FLUID IN HIS LUNGS! He could die from the anasthetic or the gall stones or the heart trouble or the lung problems. Chances are not looking good and he's in a lot of pain. I'm also four hours away. I didn't tell Mom what was wrong with me because she has enough on her plate. I didn't plan on telling anyone until I knew what was wrong either. No need to worry the family ahead of schedule. I just need hugs. M gave me tons yesterday and today. I just love that little girl to pieces.

More when I know it.
CDR

Anxiety

For the past three nights I have been having chest pains. I tried very hard not to tell R because he freaks out, but finally last night I told him. He freaked and made me go to the ER. This was a good idea, but I had to go alone because he needed to stay home with M. I arrived at 1:00amish and was hooked up to the heart moniter and they ran the EKG. They did blood work, gave me an IV, and said I would have to stay for 4-5 hours to be monitored. My heart rate was a tad high and my blood presure was high for me. They could see no signs of anything wrong with my heart, but I had to wait it out. I called R and told him that I would be there for awhile and he said that the moon was shining and it looked like a cross. This was also a bit freaky. I'm not sure if he was just tired or what, but he even tried to take pictures.

I learned later in the night that my bloodwork was normal, my EKG was good, and the chest x-rays showed no signs of anything. My heartrate and blood presure were also back to normal. This is funny because I was still having and am still having pain in my chest. They ran more bloodwork at 5:30am and that all came back clear. Therefore, no heart problems, but they say I had an anxiety attack. They perscribed some Xanax and sent me home.

Anxiety attack? Doesn't everyone have anxiety? Why now? I'm still a bit worried and I think the major cause of this is the fact that R keeps acting like he's twelve and stupid. He had a huge hissy fit yesterday about our cats and went nuts. I mean really nuts. He didn't want M to see that he was mad and I was at class so he bit his finger. He drew blood. What has happened to the calm, cool headed man that I married? I think I've turned him into a raving loon. I don't know what to do anymore. Are we just in a rut? We spent so much of our marriage trying to have a baby that maybe we just don't have anything else to work for. We don't really fight, we just don't talk or anything anymore. Maybe I'm not anxious, maybe I'm depressed. We'll see how the Xanex works and go from there.

Sorry to vent, I can't really just open up about this right now. I just needed to get it off my chest, literally.

CDR

Worst dinner ever, EVER!

Those of you who know me, know that I hate to cook. I mean absolutely hate to cook. I love to bake and I love to cook for many people, but I HATE making supper. It is the epitome of disasters in our house. If I see one more hot dog, I may lose my mind. Anyway, on the way home from work I called R and asked what he wanted for supper. We have this conversation each and every day and we both dread it like the plague. He suggested we have meatloaf. We all like meatloat and it's an easy dish. Now, don't get me wrong I CAN cook, I just hate it. There are some things that I can do really well, meatloaf is one of them. Well, we always get free beef from my parents and it just so happens that we ran out of burger. Last weekend, I bought some. I have never bought beef of any kind at the store. I take a cooler to my parents and load up. It's frozen and voila instant beef for us. M and I got home and saw that R had already gotten out the dish for the meatloaf. In other words, he knew this morning what he wanted for supper. I got out the store burger and saw that it said to use by today. Cool, we're in luck, it's still good. I didn't even know it was dated. I mixed up the meatloaf with M's help and it went in the oven. I kept checking it out to see its progress and it really didn't look good. I don't even know where to begin on it's look, yuck is the best I can do. Now to top it off, when R went to the store last week, he bought succatash and tonight he suggested we have that with the meatloaf. Yes, that's right succatash. Do you even know what that is? I didn't. I didn't have a clue that this was even a thought to have. I warmed it up and put it out. I cut the meatloaf and put it on the table. R, being the hungriest person in the universe, dug in. I told him it looked different and not to give M any until we had some to see if it was OK. His words, "it tastes different." I said in what way and he just kept saying "different" and he stuffed his face. I took some and tried it and just about threw up. It was rancid and awful. "Different" did not justify the horribly rotten taste of the "meatloaf." To top it off of course was the succatash that went with it. After one bite that didn't go down well, I asked the troops, "who wants hot dogs?" An overwhelming, "MEEEEEE" from both R and M in unison and very high pitched, very cute. We were all laughing so hard about the absolute worst meal. We haven't laughed together like that in a while. M was so funny and laughing with us. We had to settle for hotdogs and carrots. Mostly M ate pear applesauce, her new favorite, and yogurt covered raisins.

From now on we stick to dad's beef and veggies we like. Tomorrow, we are getting take out of some sort. I don't even care what really as long as it's good and I didn't have to cook it.

After the horrible supper, I made chocolate chip cookies, yummy. I hope this makes up for it.

On another note, welcome back to D and G who are home from Vietnam with their daughter.

LOL
CDR

Melodrama of a day

Well, exams are over, graded, and sent. There was an ice storm last night, but that didn't effect me really. We had an inservice today and the kids have the day off for Martin Luther King day. However, I don't think they really are doing any learning/celebrating for this occasion.

It has been a frustrating day for me though. I can't figure out why R can't take M's temperature. It's an ear thermometer, yet he can't seem to do it. She had a temp. yesterday and this morning. Not a high one, but we kept her home just in case. Our thing is to not be the ones who spread the disease at daycare. Anyway, I went to the inservice, did what had to get done and came home to relieve R so he could go to work. I'm really fed up with him not getting how hard it is for me to miss work. He truly doesn't understand why I couldn't miss today, the day before a new semester. After all, there weren't any students there, it should be easy, right? He needs to wear my shoes for one week and see just how much work is involved in my profession. I believe I've mentioned this before so I won't go there again. He also thinks that I can miss tomorrow to stay home if M is still not 100%. It's the first day of the semester, any takers on that issue? DUH!!! I don't care if he has jury duty, which he does. I think he thinks that I don't want to stay home, but he is TOTALLY missing the point. I would LOVE to stay home, it's just way easier for him to miss work. He can call in and it's done. That's it, no more to do. We all know what every teacher has to do to miss and it is NOT easy. I heard today that a parent at school said teachers shouldn't have kids because teachers then miss work for sick little ones. WHAT? What century is this?

There are other things going on at work that are not huge problems, but are none the less annoyances. We all must face these little things in our work, but they can really be aggravating. I must be in a bad mood today, because I found myself using language that I promised myself I wouldn't use any more. Why do I let myself get so bothered by things that are out of my control? Or for that matter that are in my control but not worth getting so torked up about? Sometimes I really hate that part of me. I get so overworked about something and then am so mad at myself later for how I handled it. I'm really turning into someone I don't want to be in that arena. I don't want to be the overhyped physcopath that people avoid, but there are some days when I feel myself going there. Any advise there?

CDR

Exam time

It's that time of the semester for my students, exams. Why is it that they don't seem to care? I've been pondering some thoughts with my collegues and we've decided that they just don't have any motivation to do well. No matter what we say or do, they don't seem to care. One co-worker stated that she heard a speaker say that we now live in an "it's good enough" society. I have been thinking about that a lot lately and truly believe it. My students will only do what they must just to pass, not what they can to achieve a higher score. It amazes me how many students won't turn in a large piece, half, of the exam, the essay. It bothers me and I tell them how easy it can be and that their grade is depending on this. Still, no essay. I know that I can't make the writing process any easier for them and yet nothing. It's no one kid in particular and I know that this is true across the board in schools everywhere. Why do our young adults feel that it's OK to be just average? As a policy, I do not accept late work for credit. I never have and I don't plan to. However, I get these kids every day asking me to take late work. It's making me wonder if I am speaking in a mute tone that their ipod ears can't hear. What is confusing? NO LATE WORK FOR CREDIT! They can really be so irresponsible and it drives me crazy. If I don't do my job on time, I could potentially lose my job. If they can't meet a small deadline in my class, how will they succeed in the real world? Aren't we, as educators, supposed to prepare them for reality? There can be some outsiders that don't understand this. How I say? Do they not have deadlines to meet in their professions and homes? That's life. Don't pay the bills on time and just see what happens. No power, phone, gas, heat, cable, internet, and on and on and on. They would really be suffering if they couldn't download their songs and videos onto their ipods.

I have a theory regarding all of this, but we'll save that for another time or an in person discussion. Little pitchers have big ears, right?

Whew, I feel better getting that off my chest. I mean no offense to anyone, but I really believe that there are too many people who believe that teachers have it easy. I would like for them to put on my shoes for one week and just see how "easy" we have it. I'm not saying that there aren't harder jobs, but people don't understand the amount of time we put in and how much we value what happens to our future leaders. Plus all of the requirements that are put on us outside of the schools we work for. There aren't many professions like ours where continued education is required not just recommended. It's constantly changing and ongoing.

Anyway, I could go on forever, but I won't. I want to express some happy thoughts to my friends D and G who have their little girl. She is beautiful and we can't wait to meet her.

LOL
CDR

Happy New Year!

I hope everyone enjoyed ringing in the new year. We stayed at a Holiday Inn so M could go swimming and it was quite fun. She didn't sleep well in the hotel room though. We all ended up going to bed at 8:00 so she would sleep. This was fine with us as we were very tired from the traveling that we had been doing across state. We watched the fire works in Paris and London and said happy new year before we went to bed. Then the neighbors yelled at midnight so it was celebrated. We then got an early start for home and it was good to get here. We enjoyed our last days off and are now ready to face the world tomorrow.

I would like to wish safe travels to my friends D and G who are going to Vietnam to pick up their daughter. I know she will love them as much as they love her.

Happy New Year!
CDR

Just so happy!

1. M is healthy, knock on wood!

2. Today was the beginning of the two weekish break, YEAH!!! Some people may think that teachers have it easy with the all the breaks and summer off, but we work very hard and DESERVE breaks! Each and every one of them. I would just like to see someone try to do my job.
3. The basement is all painted!
4. Friends who are adopting from Vietnam got their Visas today and will get to see their daughter in just over two weeks.
5. I'm baking cookies for Christmas, yummy.
6. R's parents super sweet and helping out a ton in the basement.
7. I know four pregnant women and they are ALL doing well. Again, knock on wood.
8. Our house smells nice because we had the carpets cleaned yesterday. They used cinnamon in the water, ooooh!

Now, I need to finish that shopping that didn't get done because someone wouldn't take a nap. I have a bazillion cookies to make, but I love to do that. I also have the wrapping to do. That I don't like to do, but it will get done.

I figure since I have to pay the daycare for a full week, M may as well go and I will get things done here. She loves it there anyway and can play.

Isn't life super? I love Christmas! Merry Christmas everybody.

LOL
CDR

Favorite time of year

Here is the official Christmas picture of cute M. I must say, she is the cutest little girl. In the last six months, her hair has finally grown. She has the prettiest curls. She says she wants to wear a ponytail, but takes it out immediately.

Yesterday we went to see the annual lights at the zoo and it was so much fun. M loves the zoo and really was excited to go. She was able to see the elephants and penguins, her two favorites. R and I love seeing her get so excited about the animals. She is so funny and she ran everywhere. We went to a new pizza buffet restaurant afterwards and it was both cheap and good. M was free and we only paid $10. Talk about an easy night out.

I'm hoping to finish my Christmas shopping today if M takes a nap which so far is not happening. R is painting in the basement with his dad, therefore, I can't just leave. I have a ton to do, but am not worried. It always comes together. The biggest challenge is R's dad. I have no idea what to get him and R is no help. He always wants to get him summer sausage. This is not a Christmas gift to your dad!! The common sense gene skipped R; he quite possibly gets that trait or lack there of, from his mother.

Just eight more days until the big day, yeah:-)

LOL
CDR

I didn't want to say she was sick, but she is...

Today was going to be the first day back to day care in over and week, then I received an email from R that M was sick, AGAIN! He had already taken her to the doctor and they said another ear infection. Yeah, R is so awesome!!

It's two things: first, and most importantly, she's sick again; secondly, we had to pay the day care for a week we weren't even there. That hurts. I understand it, I just don't like it. Then to top it off I had a small arguement with a very close friend today. I know that she thinks I'm overreacting to M being sick. Most people keep telling me that it's because she is at a new day care and she will get sick. My brain tells me that, yes, she is going to get sick. However, she has been sick for two months with little reprieve. Yes, I could be overreacting, but my gut tells me to at least find out for sure. Isn't that what I'm supposed to do as her mom? Now granted, M is an only child, and most likely will always be, but that doesn't mean I should overlook what is going on. I'm so frustrated with this whole situation and I just wanted to vent. I know that I talk about M and R too much to others. I'm not a shy person and I tend to go off on tangents quite frequently, but those who know me seem to get this. That's why I was very surprised by my close friend who didn't seem to get it. I'm sure there are things going on in her life too and I know I need to be a better listener. I was just looking for a little support, not a lecture on how if she doesn't get sick now, she'll just be sicker later. My little M is sick now and that's what matters to me. I don't mean to offend anyone, but she is what's on my mind and I tend to dwell. I just want her to be well and I'll find out more tomorrow. I know things could be so much worse and I am thankful that it might just be a cold or a viral something. That doesn't mean I should make if mean less. She is still sick. See, I'm very good at tangents.

In happier news, R is coming along in the basement. His dad came over and helped paint. They have one coat on, yeah:-) We are hopefully going to pick out carpet this weekend, double yeah:-)

I also had a chance to do some shopping someplace other than Walmart or Meijer this weekend. That made me very happy. I love how the mall smells. I haven't been in so long. I need to go again very soon.

Some close friends of mine will be leaving for Vietnam in early January to pick up their daughter. I am so happy for them. That little girl is already so loved. Another friend is doing well in her pregnancy after some very trying times, to say the least. SUPER! I know four women all due in May, which is very funny. Must have been some sort of storm and no power a few months back.

LOL
CDR

AHHHH and DOUBLE AHHHH!!!

What the hell is up with my poor little M and the sicknesses? I'm about to loose it. Again, we are dealing with the flu and we have an appointment later today to confirm what I know to be true, pink eye. She is finally acting like herself after being flu ridden since Saturday and now she can't go anywhere because she has a highly contagious disease that R and I will most probably get.

It's also crazy at work and I'm missing about five very important things today because it was my turn to stay home. R missed Monday and Tuesday. It looks like he'll be here tomorrow with the pink eye mess. It's just easier for him to miss. Being gone from my classroom is horrible. It's just so much easier to go in sick than to miss and make the arrangements needed. I have three people covering me in various locations today so I can stay home. That's another thing, why do these ailments hit at the busiest times? I am now officially referring to myself as Bad Karma. People use to ask me that all the time and now it's true.

I was also hoping to go shopping tonight with co-workers. I've been looking forward to it for weeks and now that's out. I just wanted to get some cool things and have fun with the girls. I love more than anything being a mommy, but the sicknesses must LEAVE MY HOUSE. I don't know how people get through the really tough illnesses with their kids.

Anyway, sorry to post another "my kid is sick" post, but that's what is going on in my life.

LOL
CDR

Thankfulness

Thanksgiving is one of my favorite days of the year. I love the smells, the family, the pie. This year I was in charge of the pumpkin pies. My mom usually does this, but she just had her knee replacement surgery and isn't up to this task. I love to bake, so it was no problem. I decided to do a bit more and loved doing it. Here is the problem: since Mom had her surgery, she is living with her mom, Grams, which is about 20 minutes from home and Dad. R, M, and I decided to stay with Dad because this is where we stay, it's home. I felt like my parents had gotten a divorce while I wasn't looking and I had to decide between them. IT WAS HORRIBLE! Mom had made arrangements for a cleaning lady to clean the house, which was great. I truly expected to have to clean before I could even go in the house. Dad isn't necessarily messy, but it's a farm and there are dogs and cats. You can just picture a man living on his own with the animals. It reminds me of The Waltons, you know the friend Yancy who lived with the chickens only there are no chickens in the scenario, THANK GOD. We get there and all is going well, we get up and I bake, we head to Grams' house for dinner and all is wonderful, but weird. Mom is doing very well, but she has therapy she has to do and so she did. We then went back home and I felt like I had chosen Dad over Mom. The next morning is when the crap literally hit the fan. Mom's dishwasher broke and didn't wash any of the dishes that I had run through the day before, my brother's dog crapped on the floor, NEXT TO M'S BED. I was VERY P.O.ed!! R and I did all of the dishes, I cleaned up the crap, packed our stuff and headed for the door, but couldn't find Dad. I couldn't leave without saying goodbye. He was working across the road chopping asparagus, long story. Finally said goodbye and cried, because I had ditched my Dad, all the way to Grams' house to see Mom. We decided to stay with Mom and Grams Friday night. This made their day, but I felt so guilty. I don't know know how little kids get through this. My parents will be living together again in about two weeks once the knee is better. I can't go through this and I'm 32. I will never let M be a part of having to choose which one of us she wants to be with. Therefore I am thankful that my parents are not divorced, for working dishwashers, for family, and for my own home. I just love to visit my family, but I am SO happy to come home.

As thankful that I am for my three wonderful brothers, I do wonder why they say the things they say. Mom is recovering and doing super great. One brother hasn't said two words to her in two weeks because she isn't recovering at home. Another brother is doing his best with the situation, but asked her when she was going home where she belongs. The oldest brother has a wife that is recovering herself from various ailments and hasn't got a clue what is going on, but came out to see Mom while we were there. There is no way Mom could recover at home. She is currently handicapped and can't get in the bathroom with her walker. She can at Grams's house. Do they want her to do her business in a bed pan for four weeks? Why are some boys just clueless? Dad even told her to say out there because he knows he wouldn't be around as much as she needed.

Anyway, that's the Thanksgiving news. It was great, but weird and I can't wait for Christmas. R and I are hosting for his family on Christmas Eve which really is great. His family needs to get into the family routine. They are way too focused on medical conditions and what their houses look like. If they tell R one more time that he needs to do something with our house, I might just lose it.

A late Happy Thanksgiving to you and Merry Christmas!!

CDR

On the mend, YEAH!

It's been a busy week, but little M really seems to be getting better. She is even taking a nap today, which didn't happen yesterday. Her little cough is much better and the runny nose has almost stopped entirely. Now, we must knock on wood because I mentioned that things are going well and with Thanksgiving coming and nieces and nephews around, this will probably all go to heck in a handbasket.

In other news, R and I decided it was time to update our phones. We went to the Sprint store yesterday and got brand new phones, FOR FREE. That was the best thing. We got really cool phones and paid nothing. Mine is pink, which is just fun. They also have cameras which is very cool because I took a picture of M and made it my screen saver.

For those of you who know me best, you know that having M was not the easiest for R and I. We are so fortunate for our doctors and how helpful they were to us. After trying for eight years and then finally having such a super little girl, we can't deny we chose the right path. Here we are two years later and I still keep hoping that our "boys" and "girls" would play nice. I even had a dream about it last night and I hate that. Why in the world would I now have these hopes again? I know the medically speaking, it isn't going to happen that way, but it just breaks my heart that M can't be a big sister. She is so amazing and I want another adorable little one to love. I know that there are women in far worse situations that we are, but it doesn't hurt any less. I'm surprised that I've been feeling this way because I really haven't thought about it since M was born or even before. Must be my "clock" is ticking or something and it's pissing me off. Anyway, just had to vent.

Congrats to my friends D and G who will be able to see their little girl before the end of the year. They have been waiting a long time. R and I are very excited and happy for you.

Take care and LOL,
CDR

And the sickness goes on and on and on...

M has croup. She hasn't been able to go to daycare because of the ear infection and today she started coughing and coughing. No one was sleeping, so we took her to the clinic and it's croup. I was just thankful her lungs were clear, whew!!! Now we're on new meds that are stronger and only have to give once a day for five days, instead of twice a day for ten. It must be some seriously good stuff. I just hope she gets some restful sleep tonight.

She's not the only sick kid around either. I know of at least three other moms with sick little ones right now. M is sleeping for the most part, but not these other little ones. Poor babies and mommies. It's the hardest thing in the world for the little ones to be sick and they can't say what's wrong. They just cry, poor little things.

Well, off to try and sleep.

CDR

Medical crap of sorts

M has an ear infection and started her Amoxicillin today, which means she can't go to daycare for another day. R took here to the doc. today and waited forever. Must have been a lousy weekend for everyone because everybody and their brother were at the doctor's office. Well, we're on the drugs and hope to get better. She's two and this is only her third ear infection so I won't complain. I get to stay home with my peanut tomorrow morning. I need to go to work in the afternoon to teach one class. They have presentations due and I just can't let them not give them. I know they would just be heart broken. :-)

My mom had knee replacement surgery on Friday and is doing well. She had her other knee replaced several years ago and wanted to have a matching set. She is now titanium woman and feeling pretty good. She'll have a lot of rehab, but at least her bones aren't rubbing together anymore. She has severe rhumetoid (sp) arthritis which is very painful. She's a trooper though.

Which brings me to R's mom. We feel so bad for her. She's a bit of a hypochondriac and recently seems to have taken on some cold of sorts. I guess today she really didn't look well and even commented to R that she may have walking pnemonia. We don't really think that she has this, but she must feel bad to look so bad. Poor R's dad is taking care of her and doing very well with it. However, he's also painting R's brother's new house and watching the other grandchild in his spare time. We are very concerned that he takes on too much and won't be well in the long run.

Have a duper day/night/whatever!

LOL,
CDR

Now we have a fever

I don't know how much more of this I can take. M has been the healthiest little girl and very rarely does she get sick. This fall has been a b****. She has had a runny nose forever, then the stomach flu, now a horrible cough and today a low grade fever. I can't miss work tomorrow, so R is going to take her to the doctor first thing. That's another thing, why Sunday? It's just like the stomach flu, the puking started at midnight. It kills me that it's always in the off hours that we seem to be sick. I feel so bad for her. I called my sister-in-law who has four kids and asked her if I could give M some stronger stuff. Stuff made for the bigger kids, that costs the same (see first post). She said yes and in fact had a sheet from her doctor with amounts to give, bonus for us. I so hope that it helps. Fortunately, M hasn't lost her appetite or will to play, which is great news. She just rubs the snot across her face every few minutes, which is so gross. She is good about getting a kleenex though. She sucks in instead of blowing out, but that's a normal kid thing. Eventually she'll get the hang of that.

Anyway, R painted in the basement today and it is really looking cool. We decided on a neutral color for the drywall walls and a deep brick red for the brick walls. I think it will look very cool. Funny thing is, his mom is going to hate it and that is just a hoot. We don't try to make her mad, she just asks for it. She ALWAYS has an opinion and it usually is different than mine. R and I own the house, not her. She'll have to get over it.

Those papers aren't going to grade themselves.

LOL,
CDR

Cold medicine, etc.

Why is it that cold medicine for toddlers is in a 1 oz. bottle and the bigger kid stuff is in a 4oz bottle? And, they're the same price. That's just crap. I realize that bigger kids take more at once, but why is it the same price? Also, why do people talk to me and suggest medicines for my little M that are inappropriate for her age? She can't take big kid stuff, she's only two. I'm a stickler for the proper dosage, isn't everyone else? I don't want to over medicate her unless I'm not getting sleep. So far that hasn't been the case.

R made the best dinner tonight. Yes, that's right, I have the husband who cooks for me. He used to do it more often, but it gets crazy busy sometimes. Anyway, he made hamburgers in the frying pay with onions. YUMMY! I haven't craved those in a long time and, wow, was it ever good.

We had a fog delay today from school. To some of you, this may seem a bit weird. We tend to get a lot of fog here and it can really make driving a bear. However, I looked out the window and could see quite a ways. I think they anticipated fog and called it in early. We haven't had a break in awhile, so they figured what the heck. It was OK with me, I was able to spend time with M and take her to daycare.

Sorry not too witty today, maybe tomorrow.
LOL,
CDR

Hot or cold? Which to choose?

M is so cute and wonderful, yet she's still two. We seem to be having a better week, knock on wood. We blame the flu and Halloween for the recent two year old tantrums. Of course now, she has moved on to having a cold with a cough. I have her all decked out for the night. I plugged in the Pedialite Vapor nightlight, the humidfier, gave her Robitussen and kissed her goodnight. I hope she gets better. It is killer having her sick. I worry so much about her when she sleeps when she isn't sick, let alone coughing through the night.

I had a rough day today. I opened my mouth, again, and said something that I thought would be helpful, but turned against me in a split second. I really was trying to help and ahhh, it could kick me in the butt. I'm pretty confident, now, that that won't happen, but I hate it when this happens. I seem to have a knack for doing this and I don't know why.

Voting was a hoot. We vote at the township hall which is relatively close to our house. I had to wait about five minutes to vote. That's a good sign. At the primary elections, R, M, and I were the only ones there except for the workers. They gave M a sticker that said she voted. She was very excited. They were out of stickers today by the time I got there. I hope people went to the polls. I have to say that I voted to let people shoot the morning doves. It's not about the birds, it's about the DNR doing their job. They know what's best. If we decide that they can't make the decisions about the wildlife, then what are they there for? Doves also, by the way, poop on my friends car often and should not be tolerated. IF we deny the right to hunt Doves, will we then deny the hunting of deer, for example. Deer can be a menace to a farmer, just ask my dad. R says that he heard that doves taste like chicken, yummy.

Enough babbling on,
CDR

Terrible Twos

Patrick Stewart was AMAZING!! However, we did leave at intermission because I felt horrible and tired from the stinkin flu. I bought a huge poster with him on it and plan to have it framed for my classroom.

The terrible twos have set in with M and, wow, is this hard. I have a very low tolerance for screaming and that's all M is doing lately. She changes her mind in a split second and then throws herself on the floor when she is misunderstood. She speaks very well for her age and can tell us what she wants, but refuses and loses it. It usually happens in the morning and then just before supper. We try to make sure she gets food early enough so the screaming doesn't happen and sometimes it works, but not often enough. Today she wouldn't take a nap. I left her in her crib for two hours and nothing. She just talked and talked. She didn't cry, she just talked. I know she needs a nap, but how can I explain this to her? She then of course became unbearable tonight around bath time. Of course, she has a bath phobia ever since the poop in the bathtub incident, TWO MONTHS AGO. Will she just let it go? No way. She freaks out every night, sometime less than others, but still hates the bath. She needs a bath, she needs a nap, she needs to eat veggies and we are losing patience. She had a huge fit tonight about getting into her car seat and became the stiff board. R had a heck of a time and I about went crazy. I know it's a phase and God willing, she'll outgrow it, but I don't know if I can make it through this one. The teen years are too distant to even fathom. She already has such an attitude. We tried the time out chair yesterday with some success, but it's HORRIBLE. She just screams. She is absolutely irrational about the strangest things. I love her so much, but want her to just ask using manners. I also want her to know that R and I are on the same side. She tends to know that Daddy will cave faster. He knows this too, but doesn't seem to change. Instead of ignoring the screaming, he keeps trying to console her. It drives me nuts. She is having a tantrum, don't console. She is misbehaving, don't make deals with her. I've seen my nephews and nieces go through this stage and watched my brothers handle it their way. I don't like any of their ways, but what does work? I think I'm going to tune in to Super Nanny this week and take notes.

Anyway, papers to grade.

LOL,
CDR

Flu bug on warpath

Last Friday, M came down with the stomach flu. Granted, she's two and she's going to get the flu. We dealt with it and cleaned up. She was such a trooper. It scared her though. She was pretty much on the mend by Sunday. Now, it's my turn. I was up all night last night fighting the urge to vomit. I refuse to do it. I don't care if it will make me feel better, I can't do it. Why does this have to happen now? Tonight is THE night of PATRICK STEWART. I'm going, no ifs, ands, or buts about it. I feel better as the day goes on, but still, why this week with the flu? I hope that R doesn't get it. I hate when he's sick. I also hope that I don't give it back to M. Even feeling lousy, I have washed all the bedding, towels, Lysoled the doorknobs, etc. all day to make sure it's gone. I obviously stayed home from work, which was a good decision. I hated to not go, but R thought I was crazy to go. He said I would get them sick. I see it's not really about me, now is it.

Anyway tonight's the night. Off to find something to wear.

LOL,
CDR

Multi-tasking

Isn't is amazing that more men aren't killed by their wives? I mean really, is it that hard to do a few things without absolute chaos? All he has to do is get things together in the morning and take M to daycare. Since I've been home, about 3 hours, I've: played with M in the yard, took her for a wagon ride, made the bed, did 2 1/2 loads of laundry, made dinner (leftovers, but still), ran the dishwasher, cleaned up after dinner, gave M a bath, read her a book, and put her to bed. Let's see, he ate dinner and is watching TV. HELLO!!! What the heck is up with that? He accomplished nothing this morning and I came home to a big mess. He then told me that he's doing his best. BULL****!! He's not trying at all, at least not today.

Just had to get that off my chest. Thanks for listening.

On another note, good news from Sorting the Baby stuff. I am so happy that the baby is doing well and really it's a good thing you feel like death warmed over.

CDR